Mittwoch, Juli 10, 2002

Indulging to the sound of 'the look of love' by Diana Krall and I can almost feel your arms around me~your scent still lingers in my air~ This is the kind of jazz that I like. Swaying to the music on repeat mode hoping that my tense muscles would ease a little so that sleep will come on naturally soon. Soon please, I need rest.


Trailing off:
I bet everyone has had his moments of raging jealousy when he feels threatened by rivals in a relationship. Most of the time the so-called rivals are created by the introverts' biased tolerance toward superficial attachment and the cynicism of platonic relationships. As he sees his special someone chatting up with another guy who appears to be much superior in almost all aspects of life, he is put down by the fear of his inferiority complex, which in turn cloud his mind to make him feel defeated. A sign of hurt that comes with swift mood changes are often the adverse repercussions accompanied by self-afflicted demoralisation. This impulsive assumption will only continue to subject the affected party to further deterioration of himself. He would gradually become an aggressive, hardcore "potato" kid concealing his 'imperfections' to the ignorance of the people around him if he manages to do so. Sometimes, people will let him be at his little 'cozy' corner, sulking and wallowing in self-pity. After all that for nothing, it is wholly a pathetic, inconclusive emotional battle against the sub-conscious awareness of dissatisfaction in a person as deterrent for respecting and loving oneself. Jealousy merely takes you in circles only to realise its effortless torture it inflicts on any prey who willingly allows himself to be ensnared by the evil cycle.

This is one scenario I wish I would never have to go through again or go in too deep. The past experiences have been rather mild and thus my sanity remains intact. Did you have the power to know what I was thinking just now? It is assuring enough to see you type the words tonight. Call it the power of healing and I marvel at how you are able to read my mind from time to time. It could be intuitive. It could also be a gift/knack you inherently possess like you say. Don't you take advantage of probing my thoughts nonetheless, yes :*) Lovely..

A load off my chest, I can breathe so much easier already. Nye*

# one caramel latte for the road lili-dime | 12:04 PM |